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~MINE~

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He told me to rip my beating heart from my own chest and place it in his hands. And I did.
He is my drug of choice, the addiction that seizes my breath within my lungs.
He is my God and my endless legion of Gods.
My blood forged Idol I built up and formed within my soul, with my own hands, my own voice, my own stubborn, relentless force of will.
He is my created Evil. My own Monster who’s iron gates I never intended to lock. The razor I allowed to be embedded in my heart that slices with each beat.
He is Mine.
But He was never Mine.
He is the poison near my lips I crave. The tempestic waters I step into just to drown myself over and over.
He is where I will land when I finally step off and let myself fall…
And He is the edge I stand on.
If I let Him go…He won’t be Mine.
If I let Him go…who will I be? Who was I before Him? Where will I go? Will I remember how to breathe? Think, Feel, Speak, Dream without Him?
He is Mine because I call Him Mine…my Heart knows I lie. My soul knows I lie. I gave Him the words, even, to repeat My lie, whisper it to me. Just let me believe it for a while. Just for now.
Let Me just believe Him Mine.

for *T.A.*

Everything I Do…is to Forget.
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